It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

This goes along with my earlier questions... the guilt trip I get laid on me because he is broke because he has spent all his money and borrowed from pay day loan places, bankruptcy etc. etc. and he screams and yells for me to give him money back from the child support money... I am even lucky to get any money from him at all.. now it is garnished from his wages ... he threatens suicide,,,running on the lam etc. if I don't give him money... he makes me feel so bad because he always says %26quot;if I survive%26quot; meaning if I don't give it to him then and there and he has to go on for another week without cash...

He got himself into this mess... the kids don't have enough money as it is to cover everything never alone hand it back to him... this is backwards... He relys on me feeling bad etc. in order to keep being his bank and forwarding cash...

Has anyone else had to give money back???

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Of course it's a shame. It's sad when others are messed up. Especially when it's someone who your children love and who you used to love.

Is it possible for you to just feel sorry for the guy, help him if you can, but not dwell on it? He's clearly down on his luck %26amp; spiraling out of control. Is whining about it making life any better for you or your kids? What do you want to happen next? Do you want him to just go away %26amp; leave you all alone? How will that affect your kids? How will your attitude about him affect your kids?

It seems to really be eating at you, almost like you actually do feel a bit of guilt about the situation that he's in. In previous questions, you said that you moved away from him %26amp; that the debt, depression %26amp; downward spiral started after that move. Is there anything you can do to remedy your feelings of guilt about all of this.

Clearly, he is an adult %26amp; is responsible for his own actions/reactions, but we all make mistakes, right? And, some people deal with mistakes better than others. During your relationship to him, you must have developed some sense of how he deals with adversity, loss of affection, etc - did you know/suspect/have any idea that this is how he was going to react to your leaving him %26amp; taking the kids away?

So, he's messed up. Just accept it %26amp; move on. There's really not much you can do about his issues besides simply deal with him as your lives intersect %26amp; hope that things get better for him, for your kids' sakes.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

I wouldn't think twice about it. He wouldn't get a red penny back from me and I mean that. I don't care how broke he is. That's his problem! Do you have the option of saying how broke you are? No.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

You do NOT have to give back money NOR should you. If he is hurting that bad he needs to find another or a second job. Your kids are entitled to be financially cared for by BOTH parents. He needs to grow up and stop with the dramatics. Be a man and keep the dip stick covered up if he can't afford to take care of the kiddies.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

i feel it is not him to blame but the courts who always insist on the man paying child support but never the woman. what happened to equal rights?

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

You should not give the money back. At this point the well being of your children is more important than the threats he makes. Don't listen to him. don't even talk to him it you can avoid it.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

This is why stupid people should NOT be allowed to reproduce.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Tell him that I said...

%26quot;A REAL man knows how to handle his responsibilities%26quot;.

He really needs to grow up.

Be stronger than his lame threats and guilt.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

cut the strings and let him fall youll feel beter after a while. He's a jerk!!!!!!

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

I assume the amount of child support was determined in court? Under no circumstances should you give him that money back. Not only is he showing his a** but he is also depriving his kids of a truly decent father. That money that he pays for child support is not yours, it is your childrens money! He has no right to ask for it back.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

oh my god you fool, why did you give in to him the first time? Now you have taught him that if he is dramatic and throws a wobbler that you will hand it back. Good luck trying to stop doing it know, and no way would I hand money I am entitled to back, not that my ex would dare ask for it anyway.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

i've never had to give any back but i have had to pay him to have his own kids! nx time he asks you for money back tell him to cram it. put the guilt right back on him. you didnt make the children on your own. tell him everytime you give money back he's taking food out the kids mouths, clothes off their back etc. he's a disgusting excuse for a man and is laughing his head off at you. he'll survive. i guarantee it. men like that always do, he's tapping you up for cash cos he know your an easy touch. tell him to do one. stand up for yourself and your children.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

tell him to get a part time job....wake up dont give money back if he bothers u tell the judge or police

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

He is abusing you emotionally and psychologically. I would talk to an attorney ASAP to let the court know that he is harrassing you, threatening suicide and acting in ways that make you feel frightened. He might need a psych evaluation or a restraining order slapped on him. This is HIS responsibility NOT yours. You are not together anymore, he has children and that's that.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

What are you a doormat? Stop giving the moocher money. That money goes to your kids not him. He can have the money back when he pulls it out of my cold dead hands!

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Stop being so gullible to that loser. Child Support is based off his income. If he was that poor his it would be alot less.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Every time he lays a guilt trip on you, lay one right back. Tell him about how the kids are suffering. Tell him he's being selfish and if he threatens suicide call the cops.

DO NOT GIVE THE MONEY BACK!

Your children are the ones who need it not him! He can always get a second job if he has no money!

I am raising 2 toddlers, have a full time job, going to school part time and have a second part time job. If i can do all of that, he can do a little more than what he is doing.

Men are such babies.. tell him to grow up.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

By LAW you aren't obligated to give anything back. I would cut most communication with him. If he's making you scared (threats of suicide) talk to the police or the lawyer who helped you settle the separation in the first place.

DO NOT give the money back - your kids should come before your jerk ex.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

No, I wouldn't even think about giving it back. It's court ordered. The kids are also his responsibility. He needs to do whatever he can to provide you with the support every month.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

i have never had to give money back i have how ever told the attorney general to take off some of the back child support...but in my eyes i think you should not give him money back that money belongs to the kid/s...i would tell him to shove it and that your no longer going to be his bank....he needs to get a better job...but thats my 2 cents

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

It's not yours to give back. That money is for the kids and should be used for their needs. If he's constantly harrassing you then you should file an order of protection against him.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Hey you don't HAVE to give him money back. If he is in dire straits like he says then he could go back to court and have child support reduced, but I think he is just playing you. Do you get a reciept when you give him the money back? I bet not see he can say that he pays it (and have proof because it comes out of his check) but your kids aren't benifiting from it because you give it back to him. That's just wrong.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Sounds like a guy who isn't able to make much money, primarily. Outside of that, he might be a loser and unable to control his spending habits. Is it a shame, yes.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

DONT U DARE GIVE ! RED CENT BACK!

This man has a responsibility %26amp; there is a difference between this man being so broke that he cannot afford to live on what is left after his support is taken from his check. There's not one court or program that would leave him living below the poverty olevel %26amp; speaking as the HR/Payroll person for my company - if he's taking home less then normal in his check from one week to the next - the Payroll person has to adjust his check manually so as to prevent him from having say a $25 check for the week.

Your situation is such that you are lucky your getting what you do get %26amp; you spend every dime on the children - DONT U DARE GIVE UP ONE NICKLE!

If in the event that you aare however one of %26quot;those%26quot; woman %26amp; they are out there - NOT SAYING YOU ARE! But to those that know they are - cut the man a break and get up off your own lazy as#!

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

My ex is the same way except he doesn't actually ask for it back. I never give him money. We divorced for a reason and if he calls I let it go to message that way I don't have to hear his poor me routine.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

HELL NO!!! DON'T GIVE HIM ANYTHING BACK AND DON'T FEEL GUILTY!!!

I ONLY REGRET MY CAPS AREN'T BIGGER.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Um I would not give himt eh money back. Let me explain when i hadmy daughter her father would send me 15.00 a month yes a month for support and for a long long time i swore i would never put child support on him but one day she broke out with a serious fever he told me he would western union me money to buy medicine within 30 minutes i waited all day and got nothing come to find out he went on 2 week vacation. Daughter was hospitalized for a week after that. Finally I went and put support on him and yes he whines about money issues but that's not my problem as it should not be yours. He can go out and get a better job if he has to. I'm sure hte court is not taking all of his money as we only get a percentage of what they make. So where is all hismoney going?? If he gets payday loans taht is his own fault. You should not feel guilty your baby's depend on you for support and you also depend on your ex. He depends on himself and he is not raising the children so why should he depend on you?? I would defitnatly keep the money and raise your kids. Stop feeling sorry for him. Remember there is a reason you went to court to have a child support amount established so don't feel bad becasue even if he was makign a million dollars he would still figure out how to talk you into giving themoney back.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

What a coward. DO NOT GIVE HIM ANY MONEY BACK!!!! He helped have the kids and its his fault for not watching his money the way a grown man should. The court set the minimum for a reason...THAT is the money YOU and YOUR KIDS are entitled to to give them the start they need in life. If the father is going to make YOU feel guilty, he isnt worth dealing with. Its not YOUR fault he spends his money and gets himself into bad situations. Tell him to get another job. Those wages will most likey be garnished too, but at least there will be a bit more money coming in for him. Dont you for one second feel sorry for his pathetic actions. Just know that its his own damn fault and its HIS problem to deal with not yours or the kids.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Tell him to go talk to the Judge as its his fault he ordered the support not yours. You areunder no obligation to give him anything back. He should go get a second and/or third job instead of complaining just how bad life is treating him.He probably enjoyed making them so now comes the time to pay the Piper and all he can do is candy a.s whine. Go cry to the Judge and plea for mercy. I bet hed never return money to you if this was vice versa. Good luck

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

You don't have to give the money back, you choose to. Quit choosing to. If he's not making ends meet, then he needs to get a 2nd job or find a girlfriend who can support him. And don't fall for the suicide thing either, if he dies, you'll get social security checks for the kids until they are 18.

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Are you an idiot? Why would you put an adult working male whom you didn't get along with over the best intrests of your children? What is wrong with you? Are you a drama queen or just plaint stupid? You do not even have to have any contact with the scam artist. They have agencies and places where you can do the %26quot;visitation switch%26quot;. He does not have to come to your house. You do not have to talk to him on the telephone. You already have his wages garnished. That money is for the kids. Get a separate line for the kids and don't talk to the idiot. It actually worries me that you've been given custody of minor children and are responsible for their well being and would tolerate this and ask this question publically. NO ONE HAS TO GIVE CHILD SUPPORT BACK. Are you too irresponsible to figure that out yourself?

It is a shame when the father asks for child support money back?

Don't give him anything! He can whine and complain all he wants to that he has no money. He is a grown *ss man, go out and make some more! That money is for the kids and for you to take care of those kids who he helped create and can't take care of themselves! He only threatens to hurt himself because he knows you keep giving in. STOP IT :) !